Tuesday, July 9, 2013

Modesty

What is Modesty? Is it a personal preference? Is it a social norm? What should Christian women wear? What does the Bible have to say about it? 


A common idea is that we, as women, wear revealing clothing and cause men to lust after us. Men lust. Men commit the sin, right? I disagree. Matthew 5:28 states, “But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” Did you catch it? He has
committed sin WITH her in his heart. That little four letter word W-I-T-H ties women just as deeply into the snare of sin as any man who lusts after her. Any Godly women who strives daily to please our Heavenly Father does not want to be sinning in any form, much less, in a way that they are unaware of.    You would not commit adultery with the old man you pass on the street, so why allow them to go there WITH us in their brains? God created men to love the feminine body. Our culture, however is so sexual that men are desensitized to women's bodies. They are desensitized to bodys that God created them to adore in the loving, secure, holiness of a marriage.

I don't think women are the only ones who are "in charge" of keeping our brother's minds pure, they most definitely have a responsibility to be self controlled. But as women, knowing that men are visual creatures, be respectful. Be respectful not only of men's minds and hearts, but of yourself! Men may be desensitized to the women in ads, on billboards and in the skimpy bikinis at the beach, but we are not in charge of those women and we aren't those women. Be in charge of you, your body belongs to your husband or your future husband, let's keep it that way. Let's step up and respect the pure marriage that God longs for us to all experience. To quote the movie Fun with Dick and Jane don't let them get "All up in your goodies!" (haha, I love that movie).  

The biblical sense of modesty is to allow ment to view women as a whole lot more than just our bodies. Paul writes in 1st Timothy that he wants:
 "men everywhere to pray, lifting up holy hands without anger or disputing. I also want the women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, adorning themselves, not with elaborate hairstyles or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God." 

Don't get me wrong, I love jewelry  I love accessories and I love fun hairstyles, But I love God more and I love serving Him, worshipping Him and serving others a whole lot more!! As women, we have a responsibility to not distract others from their focus on Christ. I think the term "Stay classy" is a great way to determine if it is something good to wear.

 I have struggled since having James with weather or not my clothes are "mom clothes" My summer wardrobe, while modest, was not child chasing, holding, bending over material to say the least. As I have searched and searched for comfortable, modest, cute, CLASSY summer clothes, I have found that I no longer want to shop at stores I used to, you know, the ones where you have to ask where they keep the "long shorts" (the kind that actually cover your butt? ;) I know not every reader is a mom, but we all have the responsibility of adorning ourselves in clothing pleasing to our Lord and respectful of our bodies and our brother's minds. Like I said before, it is not 100% our job to keep men's minds out of the proverbial gutter, but why not make it easier for them?

This post is not meant to condemn anyone for wearing a bikini, doing their hair or wearing jewelry. But as a wife and mother of a son, I simply want to challenge you to take a second glance at what you choose to wear, and think of what impact it could have on men. Be respectful and Stay classy ladies :)

{A few stores which I have found to have great, modest, affordable clothing are LOFTOld NavyAnn Taylor, & J. Crew}

Have a Happy Day! 
-Paige

11 comments:

  1. I personally stopped caring about modesty after I got married, for some reason I just felt that being married made modesty unimportant. Then I had a son. That changed things, but at the same time I want to be beautiful and appealing to my husband so I try to take care with my appearance and dress nicely. I find it hard to find a balance between remaining modest and still being appealing to my husband. Having children keeps one honest though.

    Loved your post, just wish it was easier to look modest and beautiful as well.

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    1. It is a balancing act, and at home I don't care too much (since James is still so small and well, he see's my boobs multiple times a day anyways! lol!) But I layer, Layer, layer! Undershirts are my best friend, making it possible to wear cute, sheer or low-cut shirts! Check out the stores I posted! they have some great things and ACCESSORIZE!

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    2. I'm also a 'creature of habit' I wear my hair in two styles, (I don't really know how to do anything else), and I have 2 pairs of earrings. And I only wear necklaces on my big days like holidays or my anniversary. lol. I grew up in a home with an absent mother and don't have a clue where to start. But I appreciate the help! I will have to try something new. :)

      P.S. You always manage to look beautiful anyways, I thought for sure your poise and perfection in the way you looked would be altered after James arrived, but boy was I wrong. :)

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  2. Amen sister!!! I love modesty and try hard to stay classy. It is really hard when stores seem determined to "un-class" women by offering clothing that isn't meant to cover much and in fact does just the opposite. I think that is why in the fall and winter I am the cardi-queen! LOL....-Jess

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  3. "That little four letter word W-I-T-H ties women just as deeply into the snare of sin as any man who lusts after her"
    I don't believe that your interpretation of 'with' is accurate here. He wasn't saying that he was engaging in the act of adultery, as she was as well. The man was committing adultery, with the women he was lusting after, in his mind. The 'with' was a modifier; who was the person HE was committing adultery with in his mind? with her.
    Also, I don't believe that women have shared responsibility as to whether men lust after them. I know many Christian men that say they find modestly more attractive than immodesty. But if they lust after me, because I'm dressed modestly, am I still responsible for their thoughts, and committing adultery (by your definition, 'with him'? Should I then dress less modestly as to 'help my fellow brother' not fall into sin because of his own thoughts?

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    1. Exactly.It is a serious mistake to interpret scripture in the English version for one... and also, to base your entire thoughts and interpretations on an English preposition. Lastly is this scripture as a WHOLE about medesty or coveting a woman that is not your own. To me, this is all about adultry and honestly, there is not way of knowing if this was a woman forced into sexual slavery... and I can't keep going... Don't blame another person's sin on someone else... that's not what Jesus did in the scripture.

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  4. Jesus doesn’t say, “everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart, so ladies, be sure to dress more modestly.” Instead he says to the men, “if your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away”! The IVP New Testament Commentary notes that at the time, “Jewish men expected married Jewish women to wear head coverings to prevent lust. Jewish writers often warned of women as dangerous because they could invite lust (as in Sirach 25:21; Ps. Sol. 16:7-8), but Jesus placed the responsibility for lust on the person doing the lusting

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    1. Yes.

      It an absolute heresy to say that I SIN if a man lusts after me.

      And, even if you are covered head to toe, there are men who will daydream about what you've got under all that fabric.

      Stop twisting Scripture and making women responsible for a man's sin. The Bible doesn't do that.

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    2. Yes.

      It an absolute heresy to say that I SIN if a man lusts after me.

      And, even if you are covered head to toe, there are men who will daydream about what you've got under all that fabric.

      Stop twisting Scripture and making women responsible for a man's sin. The Bible doesn't do that.

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  5. My body belongs to me.

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